It’s True, Men Have Families Too!

As children and dads want to see more of each other, workplaces will need to adjust. From the Equal Employment Opportunities Trust, Work & Family file, August 1997.

Traditional views that family life should not intrude on the workplace are changing, as more organisations realise employees will be more productive if they can achieve an appropriate balance between paid work and family needs.

Work and family initiatives and family-friendly policies should not be directed only at women or be seen to benefit only mothers in paid work.

Otherwise women continue to do the “double shift” and men will be discriminated against if they are actively involved in family responsibilities.

But workplace policies are directed only at women. Achieving and sustaining balance between the demands of a paid job and responsibilities outside the workplace is a desirable outcome for all employees.

As Howard Davies, Director General of the Confederation of British Industry, reports: “What is most important is for employers to accept that helping people achieve a balanced home life is the surest way of increasing their contribution to the company.”

This approach does mean a change from traditional work patterns and organisational cultures which have been based on the “invisibility” of men’s families.

Most employers have traditionally assumed that most male employees, particularly those in executive positions, are supported by wives at home who take care of them and their children, leaving the men free to work as many hours as the organisation requires, and go wherever they are sent.

The higher up the executive ladder men go, the greater may be the pressure to perform for the company and the greater the difficulty in handling family responsibilities, in turn placing more load on women.

Today, however, an increasing proportion of women are themselves in paid work with less time available for other needs, and their partners and men generally are having to face up to a steadily increasing share of family responsibilities.

Although on average women still do much more of the housework and childcare than men, there is an increasing expectation that men should take on a greater share of these responsibilities and studies show that men are certainly doing more housework than their fathers or grandfathers did as well as taking far more responsibility for children.

A 1990 Time Use Pilot Survey found that New Zealand men were then spending an average of three hours out of a 24 hour day in handling family and household chores and responsibilities, compared to an average of five hours a day for women.

The ratio has decreased since the 1980s, when women handled twice as much housework as men, and even more so from the 1960s, when women were doing three times as much unpaid work as men.

In some couples today, it is the mother who goes out to paid work while the father stays home to mind the children.

This reflects the fact that increasingly women have been taking advantage of educational and career opportunities, and can now earn higher salaries than perhaps less-qualified spouses.

In a report published in 1995, the Department of Statistics noted that over one in five (22 percent) of all children lived in sole-parent families in 1991. Of these children, a small but significant proportion (one in seven) lived with their father.

The highest incidence of children living with a male sole parent was amongst boys over 10 years – one in five boys aged 10 to 14 living in a one-parent family lived with their father.

The increasing number of sole-parent families reflects the high level of divorces in New Zealand. Indeed, the emotional and economic pressure and stresses of couples trying to balance work and family needs may well be contributing factors behind many such marriage break-ups.

Family responsibilities extend beyond caring for children.

With the ageing of New Zealand’s post-war baby boomers, caring for or assisting elderly parents is adding extra pressure on many of today’s middle aged workers. Maori, Pacific Island and other ethnic groups may also have responsibilities to their extended families.

At the same time, many men are also working longer hours and are under greater pressure at work, owing to restructuring, downsizing and a process of continual market change in today’s increasingly competitive world.

An Institute for Public Policy Research report in the UK states that many fathers are suffering “role strain” in trying to balance work and family needs, and that few attempts are being made to help them.

The Institute suggests employers adopt “father-friendly” policies with initiatives like paternity leave, parental or other special leave (such as caring for a sick child) and greater flexibility in varying working hours to suit family needs.

It identifies employer benefits as “reduced tardiness and absenteeism, and increased productivity and company loyalty.”

The report adds: “Thirty percent of employee absence is due to stress. Enabling fathers to have more satisfying relationships with children helps reduce their stress levels, improves their effectiveness at work, and supports their relationships with their partners – leading, ultimately, to less employment disturbance from family disruption.”

In the United States, growing numbers of men are regaining a balance by leaving successful jobs to spend time with their families. Men in business, having witnessed the loss of company loyalty inherent in downsizing, are totting up how much they’re worth on paper to determine whether they can afford to quit.

However, for most men the economic reality means that this is simply not an option. Instead, what is really needed is a change in workplace culture and the introduction of family friendly policies which enable men to have satisfying family relationships as well as to succeed in their jobs.

However, even when such policies exist and are gender-neutral, men may be reluctant to take advantage of them through concern this might damage their career prospects, or that they might be regarded as “wimps” or “unable to hack the pace.”

A study in the USA featured recently in Fortune magazine, indicated that well-educated men with working wives are paid and promoted less than men with stay-at-home wives, possibly because they can’t clock as much face time.

Arlene Johnston, vice-president of the Families and Work Institute, USA says employers need to ensure their work and family policies are credible, are seen to be supported by management, and are seen not to harm people’s careers.

She calls for “no fault flexibility” with a change in organisational culture which recognises that those working part-time or who take other flexible options are no less committed and productive than full-timers.

“People want more options,” Johnston says. “Men saw their fathers make sacrifices at home for work, and they don’t want to experience that.”

So what can organisations do to help men balance their work and family needs?

In the book “Balanced Lives: Changing Work Patterns for Men,” the UK organisation New Ways to Work cites examples like:

♦ A Swedish insurance company which offers male and female employees a cash bonus if they take at least six weeks’ parental leave.

♦ Promoting supervisors and managers who take parental leave, rather than marginalising them.

♦ Encouraging fathers to consider working reduced and flexible hours.

♦ Encouraging fathers to work from home when appropriate.

♦ Allowing fathers to take career breaks without affecting service entitlements.

♦ Providing advisory material and information packs for fathers-to-be and their partners.

New Ways to Work has published a study of UK men utilising those sorts of options, who generally felt they had achieved a better quality of life and felt they were working with increased motivation and energy.

As for their reasons in making such a change, one of the participants commented: “I don’t know of anyone on their deathbed who wished they had spent more time in the office, whereas a lot wished they had spent more time with their kids.”

If men in your organisation share that view, you need to encourage management to create a culture where work and family policies are integrated into strategic management plans and where initiatives are taken to encourage all employees, including men, to exercise greater choice in balancing work and family responsibilities.

Next: Fathering The Future Infects Wellington, Auckland And Nelson.