Stories start trickling in here about fathers being the rock to lean on for the rest of the family in these times.

Especially if you live in the east of Christchurch you’re likely to have done things like shoveling plenty of mud, secured what’s left of the chimney, built some kind of ‘toilet’, organised the hardware to get you through and many of you will work long hours in the effort to restore services to the city. But most of all, in amongst all that, you probably made sure you appeared calm and were ready to comfort partner and/or children.

Please accept a huge pat on the back for this from us.

At the same time we know that the crash is going to come for many dads as their own anxieties stay bottled up while they are needed. This is a well-known reaction for dads, most often seen where men have partners suffering from postnatal depression: as their partners recover the dads start to dip. This is not merely an ‘adrenalin hangover’ and often leads to severe depression.

If you feel overwhelmed, overtired, or very anxious especially after an aftershock, but don’t want to show your own worry to your own family, feel free to talk to us. Talking about your true feelings now will at least soften, possibly even prevent the crash later.

It is possible that we can do even more for you, but talking really is very important right now.

Please, take care of yourselves.

Harald Breiding-Buss
General Manager
Father & Child Trust