Ideal Of Shared Parenting Unites Kiwis
1999 Wellington Father's Forum
More than 90% of respondents to a poll conducted by the Office of the Children's Commissioner (OCC) agreed to the statement "society should expect equal parenting". 80% believed there should be more publicity about good fathers and more than two thirds supported special paternity leave when a new baby is born. Women were slightly more likely to support these ideas than men.
The poll was part of the OCC's "Fathers Who Care: Partners in Parenting" project and is included in their report "Fathering in the New Millenium", released at the Wellington Social Policy forum.
More than 2000 people were interviewed by telephone about their attitudes regarding the role of fathers today, but the poll is not representative. Instead, the OCC combined the results of three distinct groups, each making up a third of the sample. These were: current parents, past parents and non-parents.
The idea of shared parenting unites all age groups. 80 -97% of all respondents over 20 believed that both parents should help their children with behavioural, school or personal problems and join in outdoor activities.
Slightly more traditional views emerged in the older age groups (over 55) when it comes to being involved with sons or daughters, or with their children's health problems, but even here two thirds or more agreed that both parents should share these responsibilities equally. People were less sure about equal sharing of day-to-day care, but in the 20-54 age groups, again two thirds or over believed this should be done equally.
"There is clearly a gap between what many fathers want to do with their children, and what they actually do. [..] The survey results demonstrate that this is a gap that current parents in particular wish to close in favour of a greater sharing in all parenting activities". writes Rae Julian in the report.
The participants identified several reasons why this is so. 57% agreed that men aren't taught fathering, indicating a lack of opportunities for men to learn about parenting. 41% believed the Family Courts discriminate against fathers, only 25% disagreed (the rest weren't sure). And 45% believed women are better childrearers, but a higher number( 47%) disagreed. More men than women believed this, and generally agreement was highest amongst people who are not active parents at the moment. A whopping 94% disagreed with the statement that "child rearing is not manly", a figure that is edging even closer to the 100% mark with current parents.
Many respondents rejected the idea that fathers don't have time for child rearing due to work or other commitments. 53% disagreed that work is a major obstacle, and 74% would not accept any other excuses for not being there, either. Especially the current parents no longer see work as a major problem.
The report concludes that "If the trends shown in this research continue, then it seems likely that we are moving towards a society where gender is not a major issue in parenting and where each parent performs those aspects of a parent's role for which they are best suited as individuals."